Build your resilience

This week it has been widely reported in the press that Hector Sants is taking time off to recover from stress and exhaustion.   While it is fantastic that he is getting the time and space he needs to recover his health, it reminded me of the importance of looking after ourselves.  So today I wanted to share my top tips for building your resilience.

I say building resilience, as the key to good stress management is to build the emotional and mental strength to know that you are OK, even if you don’t feel fully in control of your situation.  While I encourage everyone to manage their time effectively, take control of what you are able to, there are times when we simply have to accept there are things we can’t control.  I was reminded of this myself this week when my landlady told me she would like me to move out by the end of the year, so her spare room is available for her cousin in case he needs it.   This came as a big shock given that I only re-located to London in August.  So while yes it was a shock, it is annoying to have to move again so quickly, I am very aware that I have the resilience to cope with moving again.

So what helps build resilience?

  1. As I already said taking control of what you can control and accepting what you can’t control.
  2. Building a supportive network of friends to who are able to listen when you need support is essential, the old adage a problem shared is a problem halved is true.
  3. Be active, whether it’s simply going for a walk in the park or going to the gym.  Physical activity helps us feel mentally stronger and helps clams us emotionally so we are able to see the root cause of our problems so we are able to find effective solutions.  I find going for a walk in a park, clears my mind and gets my creative juices flowing so I can calmly deal with my problems.
  4. My next tip may seem rather strange but volunteer or do some kind of community work.  Being around people who have more challenges helps us put our problems in perspective.  For example talking to someone who is dealing with the challenges of cancer really put my needing to move again into perspective.
  5. When we feel really in a rush and under pressure it is very tempting to reach for alcohol, coffee or chocolate, but in the long term these don’t offer real solutions.
  6. In the spirit of keep it simple, stupid, always remember that deep breaths helps the body to relax and help you to let go of whatever mental angst is going on.  When you get busy or anxious it is common to breath very rapidly from the top of your chest.  Putting your hand on your belly, and try breathing in for a count of three and then breath out for a count of three – with the aim of seeing your hand move as you breath deeply enough.
  7. Remember Reiki is great if you feel all over the pace  and jaded, while massage helps release all those tight achy shoulders.

Related Posts

  • Tips to prevent lower back pain.

    While on holiday I suddenly moved and strained my lower back muscles.  My muscle strain was sorted out by a combination of massage, stretches and back exercises.  So as I have now returned from sunny Bulgaria I thought I would remind people (including me) how to preventing lower back pain.

    1. Avoid sudden jerky movements. (Note to self, that includes while on holiday).
    2. Never slouch.
    3. Switch sitting positions often and periodically walk around or gently stretch muscles to relieve tension.
    4. Don’t bend over without supporting your back.
    5. Try to maintain your ideal body weight.  Too much upper body weight can strain your lower back.
    6. Sleep on your side to reduce any curve in your spine, and always sleep on a firm surface.
    7. Lift with your legs.
    8. If you smoke, quit.  Smoking reduces blood flow to the lower spine and causes the spinal discs to degenerate.
    9.  Wear flat shoes with cushioned soles as they can help reduce the pressure on your back.
    10. Regular exercise, such as walking and swimming, is an excellent way of preventing back pain.  In addition Yoga & Pilates can strengthen your core muscles reducing the strain on your back and improving the flexibility of your spine.

  • One for all you amateur athletes

    In my lifetime I have seen more and more people become what a friend insightfully called amateur athletes.  This is due to the impact of the public health campaign to get to us to recognise the importance of regular exercise to keep us healthy.  This has led to more people going to the gym regularly taking part in all forms of sporting competitions. I appreciate I am older than most of the clients who visit out clinic.  But when I was growing up it was quite rare for people to go the gym or for adults to take part in sports-based competitions who were not professional athletes. A recent review published by the British Journal of Sports Medicine concludes that sleep is an important determinant of health, wellbeing and performance in collegiate athletes, it is not always a priority for them.   In addition sleep allows the body to repair itself which is crutial if you are working towards a fitness goal e.g. a triathalon or marathon or big hockey game etc This made me wonder about the clients we see at the clinic, who are juggling demanding careers, personal fitness goals, busy social lives, families and sometimes living in environments that are not conducive to restorative sleep. So, I wanted to leave you with a question, how much of a priority is sleep in your life? Here is a reminder of some Sleep tips Reference https://bjsm.bmj.com/content/53/12/731.full

  • Your energy account

    We all know that we aim to have a good nights sleep to wake up full of energy.  But as I have said before, sleep is only one way to boost your energy.   Think of yourself as having an energy account, and energy raising activities e.g. sleep, credit your energy account and energy draining activities e.g. frustration, debit your energy account.  You may find it helpful to work out the balance on your energy account. Use the table below to identify what in your life drains your energy and what raises your energy.

    Energy Debits  - Energy Draining Activites Energy Credits - Energy Raising Activities
    Unhealthy eating with heavy, rich, fatty, sugary good Health diet with give excellent nutrition supported by vitamin and mineral supplements
    Alcohol Cigarettes Drug abuse Over-stimulation (including over work) Natural highs from nature, dance, relaxation, music, physical achievement, humour and creativity.
    Sedentary lifestyle Exercise
    Fear Worries Anxiety Stress Frustration Depression Feeling things are out of control Security Peace of mind Rest Joy Happiness
    Isolation and loneliness Lack of love or support Being dominated Being stuck in the past Close personal relationships Sense of belonging Healthy boundaries Ability to forgive including yourself
    No self-expression Boredom Underachievement Creative self-expression Excitement Achieving
    Lack of purpose and meaning Clarity about your true values, purpose and meaning
    Difficult relationships Good relationships
    Lack of spiritual nourishment No sources of uplift Good sources of spiritual uplift
    Now you have worked out what is happening to your energy account.  If you are unhappy with how much energy your have then I recommend you go back through the energy raising activities and consider what you can easily incorporate into your life.  Once you had done this and implemented them, then you can go through your energy draining activities and see what you can give up.  It is important to boost your energy first as it put you in to a positive state of mind before tacking what in your life drains your energy.