How much stress is too much?

How much stress is too much?

Because of the widespread damage stress can cause, it's important to know your own limit. But just how much stress is "too much" differs from person to person. We're all different. Some people are able to roll with the punches, while others seem to crumble in the face of far smaller obstacles or frustrations. Some people even seem to thrive on the excitement and challenge of a high-stress lifestyle. Your ability to tolerate stress depends on many factors, including the quality of your relationships, your general outlook on life, your emotional intelligence, and genetics.

Things that influence your stress tolerance level

  • Your support network – A strong network of supportive friends and family members can be an enormous buffer against life’s stressors. On the flip side, the more lonely and isolated you are, the greater your vulnerability to stress.
  • Your sense of control – It may be easier to take stress in your stride if you have confidence in yourself and your ability to influence events and persevere through challenges. If you feel like things are out of your control, you’re likely to have less tolerance for stress.
  • Your attitude and outlook – Optimistic people are often more stress-hardy. They tend to embrace challenges, have a strong sense of humor, and accept that change is a part of life.
  • Your ability to deal with your emotions – You’re extremely vulnerable to stress if you don’t know how to calm and soothe yourself when you’re feeling sad, angry, or overwhelmed by a situation. The ability to bring your emotions into balance helps you bounce back from adversity and is a skill that can be learned at any age.
  • Your knowledge and preparation – The more you know about a stressful situation, including how long it will last and what to expect, the easier it is to cope. For example, if you go into surgery with a realistic picture of what to expect post-op, a painful recovery will be less traumatic than if you were expecting to bounce back immediately.

Am I stressed?

If you ask people are they stressed, most people will say no.  The reality is that people rarely feel stressed out.  So I wanted to publish a guide to helping you becoming more aware of when your stress goes to high. Psychologist Connie Lillas uses a driving analogy to describe the three most common ways people respond when they’re overwhelmed by stress:

  • Foot on the gas – An angry, agitated, or “fight” stress response. You’re heated, keyed up, overly emotional, and unable to sit still.
  • Foot on the brake – A withdrawn, depressed, or “flight” stress response. You shut down, pull away, space out, and show very little energy or emotion.
  • Foot on both – A tense or “freeze” stress response. You become frozen under pressure and can’t do anything. You look paralyzed, but under the surface you’re extremely agitated.
Signs and Symptoms of Stress Overload The following table lists some of the common warning signs and symptoms of stress. The more signs and symptoms you notice in yourself, the closer you may be to stress overload.
Cognitive Symptoms Emotional Symptoms
  • Memory problems
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Poor judgment
  • Seeing only the negative
  • Anxious or racing thoughts
  • Constant worrying
  • Moodiness
  • Irritability or short temper
  • Agitation, inability to relax
  • Feeling overwhelmed
  • Sense of loneliness and isolation
  • Depression or general unhappiness
Physical Symptoms Behavioral Symptoms
  • Aches and pains
  • Diarrhea or constipation
  • Nausea, dizziness
  • Chest pain, rapid heartbeat
  • Loss of sex drive
  • Frequent colds
  • Eating more or less
  • Sleeping too much or too little
  • Isolating yourself from others
  • Procrastinating or neglecting responsibilities
  • Using alcohol, cigarettes, or drugs to relax
  • Nervous habits (e.g. nail biting, pacing)

Good Posture Exercise

Having spoken previously about why poor posture is bad for you, I wanted to move on to give you a simple exercise that helps promote good posture.  Brugger's exercise routine is devised to activate postural muscles weakened and simultaneously stretched by a prolonged sitting posture. Slumped Position slumped Check the tension in your upper back and shoulders in the slumped posture and then in the Brugger's position, to see if you notice any difference as the muscle tension is dramatically reduced. Brugger Exercise Posture bruggers Step By Step Guide

  1. Sit perched towards the edge of your seat; this will naturally place your lower back into a curve (lumbar lordosis) with your butt sticking out a little.  As you do this your breastbone (sternum) will naturally lift up.
  2. Separate your legs to 45 degrees each side with your feet turned out slightly and in line with your knees.
  3. Your shoulders are relaxed and down with your chin tucked in, making the back of your neck longer – imagine a piece of string is attached to the top of your head and someone is lifting you up.
  4. Fully straighten (extend) both elbows and arms.
  5. Make sure you keep your shoulders down and imagine your shoulder blades [scapula] are pushing down and together to form a V.
  6. Turn your thumbs out (externally rotate), palms up.
  7. Separate your fingers.
  8. You should now be in the position show above in the Brugger's exercise posture picture.
  9. Hold for 30 seconds.
Ideally you should perform the Brugger's exercise once for every thirty minutes of sitting, so why not try this once a day. PS The Science This exercise was developed by a Swiss Neurologist called Alois Brugger MD,  the exercise is neither a traditional stretch or strengthening technique but works neurologically by being complementary to the way your body is wired to work. Our bodies are neurologically much stronger in all of our flexor muscles. This is displayed perfectly if we look at a person with a neurological disorder, e.g. cerebral palsy; their body naturally has increased tension (hypertension) in the flexor muscles, also known as the spastic posture. This demonstrates our natural prosperity to an Upper Cross Posture which often develops when we sit for prolonged periods of time in a slumped position. Muscles work in groups. When one group is working then the opposing group are unable to work (inhibited).  An easy example to visualise of this is when you place food in your mouth. To do this you flex your fingers, wrist muscles, bicep muscles and pecs., all flexors. However, to be able to do this you have to inhibit your finger extensors, wrist extensors, triceps, rhomboids etc. This is called reciprocal inhibition. If you were unable to do this you would be unable to feed yourself. The Brugger exercise works on the principal of reciprocal inhibition. When doing this exercise you are activating all your extensor muscles and therefore inhibiting all of your (usually hyper activated) flexor muscles.  

Mindfulness versus Meditation

Mindfulness is gaining popularity as is meditation. Advocates recommend both as tools to assist us with our modern 24/7 non-stop busy lives that are packed with conflicting demands and uncertainty. But Mindfulness and Meditation are not synonymous. Meditation is one technique for practicing mindfulness but not the only one. I know many people, including myself, find meditation difficult as it requires dedication and practice. So I was very interested to read Ellen Langer, (of Harvard University) who is considered the mother of mindfulness, define mindfulness as the "simple process of noticing new things.". One of the things that puts busy people of Mindfulness is the misconception that is requires effort. So if you thought mindfulness was just as easy as mindlessness would you be more mindful?

Build your resilience

This week it has been widely reported in the press that Hector Sants is taking time off to recover from stress and exhaustion.   While it is fantastic that he is getting the time and space he needs to recover his health, it reminded me of the importance of looking after ourselves.  So today I wanted to share my top tips for building your resilience. I say building resilience, as the key to good stress management is to build the emotional and mental strength to know that you are OK, even if you don’t feel fully in control of your situation.  While I encourage everyone to manage their time effectively, take control of what you are able to, there are times when we simply have to accept there are things we can’t control.  I was reminded of this myself this week when my landlady told me she would like me to move out by the end of the year, so her spare room is available for her cousin in case he needs it.   This came as a big shock given that I only re-located to London in August.  So while yes it was a shock, it is annoying to have to move again so quickly, I am very aware that I have the resilience to cope with moving again. So what helps build resilience?

  1. As I already said taking control of what you can control and accepting what you can’t control.
  2. Building a supportive network of friends to who are able to listen when you need support is essential, the old adage a problem shared is a problem halved is true.
  3. Be active, whether it’s simply going for a walk in the park or going to the gym.  Physical activity helps us feel mentally stronger and helps clams us emotionally so we are able to see the root cause of our problems so we are able to find effective solutions.  I find going for a walk in a park, clears my mind and gets my creative juices flowing so I can calmly deal with my problems.
  4. My next tip may seem rather strange but volunteer or do some kind of community work.  Being around people who have more challenges helps us put our problems in perspective.  For example talking to someone who is dealing with the challenges of cancer really put my needing to move again into perspective.
  5. When we feel really in a rush and under pressure it is very tempting to reach for alcohol, coffee or chocolate, but in the long term these don't offer real solutions.
  6. In the spirit of keep it simple, stupid, always remember that deep breaths helps the body to relax and help you to let go of whatever mental angst is going on.  When you get busy or anxious it is common to breath very rapidly from the top of your chest.  Putting your hand on your belly, and try breathing in for a count of three and then breath out for a count of three - with the aim of seeing your hand move as you breath deeply enough.
  7. Remember Reiki is great if you feel all over the pace  and jaded, while massage helps release all those tight achy shoulders.
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